Hashlings: A project with actual utility? ⛏
Think it's too late to mine $BTC? Think again. 😱
Hashlings: A project with actual utility? ⛏
WAGMI is bullshit. Most jpeg projects will not make it. Most startups, up to 90% of them, end up in failure. When you think about it, startups are new businesses with actual value propositions run by serious people. These people have been able to raise funds based on their value prop.
A jpeg project, on the other hand, has an incredibly low barrier to entry. You can gather a few friends, hatch up some art, cook up a half-baked idea, and run with it. There’s a decent chance you might even succeed with minting out. 💸
When you look at the space, this is what the majority of projects are: Smoke and mirrors.
So if most startups fail, what makes us think that all these jpeg projects will succeed? I’m no math scientist, but the math doesn’t add up. 👨🔬
Reality is, most projects overpromise and underdeliver. I like to look at jpeg projects as startups for retail investors, where the mint funds are akin to seed funding. That’s why it’s rare when a project actually has something to offer before going public.
Hashlings is such a project. Let’s take a closer look.
Tf is a Hashling? 🤨
Money tall like Jordan
Before we begin, I’d like to share that I am the CMO of this project. I share this because I want you to know that I would never join a project team if I didn’t believe in what they’re building. These past few months, I’ve been asked quite a few times to join a project, as Ambassador and what not. Hard pass… until I found Hashlings. 🙂
So! Let’s get into it. Hashlings is an Ordinals project. One Hashling gets you access to our Bitcoin Clubhouse. Each Hashling also gets you access to a discounted mining rig, which you can purchase separately.
The rig in question is the s19k Pro, the newest rig available. When you get it through Hashlings, the price tag is $1995. Purchase it retail, and it’ll cost you $2520, aaand on top of that…
You have to pay for shipping and tax.
You have to run it yourself. Depending on how much electricity costs are around where you live—good luck with that. 😭
If you receive a damaged rig, you have to cover return shipping if whomever you purchased it from agrees to replace it/refund you. You also have to cover shipping for the new rig + taxes.
Now, what are the benefits of purchasing the rig via Hashlings?
Via our strategic mining parter, Luxor, we have a hosting rate of .07 kwh at a partner facility. That’s a fixed-cost agreement, btw, meaning that even in 2025, that the rate we’ll still be paying.
The $1995 price tag covers all costs, including shipping and tariffs.
The price tag also includes installation, management, and repairs by the team at Luxor.
If your rig is damaged or faulty, our team will replace it with one of our own rigs, and we’ll deal with the damaged one on our end. (No skin off your back.)
Lastly, it’s your rig to own. There is no revshare. (Fuck revshare.) This means, 100% of the sats you’ve mined with your rig end up in your wallet every month. 💰
The only thing you have to cover are the electricity costs every month, which comes out to roughly US$140 per rig. You have the option to pay in fiat, or with the sats you’ve mined… but if you’re smart, you’ll want to keep stacking those sats and figure out a way to pay up with your rapidly depreciating fiat for max profit.
Sound too good to be true? Well…
How is Hashlings able to do this?
Satoshi’s Cave
Hashlings is also registered in the United States, under Satoshi Labs, LLC.
Luxor has only ever partnered with 2 other jpeg projects, btw: OMB and DeGods for the BTC gods mint block.
Hashlings is the third. 😲
Hashlings founder, ASICs, is fully doxxed. His name is Josh Mills, and he ran one of the largest industrial mining facilities in the Midwest before deciding to start his own project.
Before we get into all the other details, yes, there are whale tiers.
If you’re holding 7 Hashlings, you’re a HashLord. Being a Hashlord gives you some privileges and benefits, like…
1:1 Honorary custom Hashlord (undisclosed artists) post-Bitcoin halving
Hashling Welcome Package (swag), sent following completion of mint
Limited to 125 spots (25 filled already)
If you’re holding 21 Hashlings, you’re a HashKing. Being a Hashking comes with maximum status, privileges, and benefits.
1:1 Honorary custom Hashking designed by Zodd post-Bitcoin halving. (Zodd, our artist, is a fucking legend, btw. He’s under NDA for about a dozen projects, but it’s public knowledge that he’s worked on art like Green Eyes for OMB, specifically the bozos in the collection 🤡)
Private whale chat with the team 🐳
Hashking Welcome Package (swag), sent following completion of mint
Future IRL on-site mining opportunities
Limited to 75 spots (25 filled already)
But being a Hashling isn't just about mining…
There’s more to being a Hashling than just mining
To wit: Owning a Hashling means you own a pass to our exclusive Bitcoin Clubhouse. In addition to the rig offer, this means…
You get access to the clubhouse. This might be a given, but if a name’s made it on the Black List, whether they’ve purchased a Hashling or not, they’re banned. We’re aiming to curate a tightknit community of Bitcoin goats and legends. If you’ve made it, Welcome.
You get access to exceptional courses relating to Bitcoin. We create these courses ourselves, and you can even request or propose course ideas. If it makes sense, and there’s enough demand, we might create one. If not, we can always bring in an expert to hold a webinar.
You get to attend private AMAs with prominent members in the Bitcoin community. We’re planning to bring in a roster of only the best of whom Bitcoin has to offer. Do members want us to bring in someone to chat about special sats? You got it. Want someone to come in and talk about Luxor? Done.
You get access to whitelist spots to highly coveted projects + other benefits with collaborating communities. Any project can ask another project to get whitelist spots. That’s cool. But we aim to secure and curate only the best projects out there. Our members are NOT exit liquidity, so we want to vet every project carefully before sharing with our community.
Sound pretty good? 🤝
A long-term plan in the making
Hashlings: An Invitation-Only Bitcoin Club
When we’re ready to offload the rigs come late 2025, we’ll sell them off to retail together. However, should you want your rig(s), just cover shipping and we’ll send it wherever you want.
Now is the cheapest time to buy in and get a Hashing with these heavily discounted rigs. In other words, as far as asymmetric bets go, if you’re a believer in Bitcoin, now might be the most opportune time for you to get in before the bull run is in full send. 🚀
Remember: If you’re not early, you’re late. If you’re late, you’re chasing your own tail, and that usually ends badly.
The private sale is on now, and is by Invitation Only. The price is $299 USDC per Hashling, so put on your best tux and hit me up in the dm’s on Twitter if you’ve got any questions or you’re thinking of joining up.
You don’t have to be someone special; you just have to bring the right vibes. We’ll airdrop the Hashlings once we hit our internal targets. Progress is looking good. Vibes in the Clubhouse are fantastic.
There really is no better way to become a $BTC miner rn. 🧡